I recently listened to the Bjork song All Is Full of Love and did a free write to it. When I first heard it, my mind conjured up a rather disturbing image of a boy in a red shirt, his body twisted at a strange angle in a pile of rubble, his shirt the only color in a sea of gray. As the song progresses, the camera zooms out slowly, the song becomes fainter, and we hear shouts and sirens blaring.
I recently rewatched La La Land for the fourth time, and was able to catch up on a lot of things I didn’t catch the first time. I was amazed yet again by Emma Stone’s fabulous acting and the intricacies of her character. I could go on forever about this movie. Ugh.
I also thought about The Perks of Being a Wallflower and Charlie’s love for his friends, especially Sam. How he was willing to do anything for her, sacrifice his own happiness believing that she would be happy because of it.
(Now, I realize this sounds cheesy and a little bit fake, but if you read the book or even watch the movie, you’ll see what I mean.)
I’ve been telling myself that I’m excited about graduation. I’ve managed to convince myself partially that I will find my people at college, people who likes to write and read and watch movies. I’ve dreamed up a college where every good thing I have now is magnified and every bad thing is diminished. Of course, this is not going to be what happens, but as a romantic and idealist, I allow myself to slip into these daydreams.
Thinking about it now, I realize that I’m completely terrified of graduation. Scared to death. I don’t know exactly when I started feeling this way, can’t pinpoint an exact moment when I started missing people even before they were gone.
I’m looking at my friend now, and I already miss him.
And some time in between some things, I believe that every story is a love story. Not the cheesy teenage dramas that you’d probably think of. Not The Notebook or Titanic. Not love stories as if there can only be romantic love. Love stories because I think that in so many cases, we are motivated by a deep love for someone else.